Random thoughts of late

Friday night, sipping on a bourbon, and some random thoughts flowing. Thinking the other day that even though most of my life I play a serious hard arse, I’m pretty soft in the middle and I was talking to this guy at a seminar about it, wondering why. Exposing myself a little more than I normally would.

I’m always looking to be the centre of attention, if a person has a camera, I’m the first to get in front of it, and always asking for forgiveness rather than permission. So what should I expect. I kind of need to show myself to the world and not (like one of my mentors said) make a ‘caricature of myself’ like a cartoon and end up forgotten, coz I’m sure caricatures may be amusing temporarily, but they end up dead eventually.

So I struggle with this, even when I’m with my boy, trying to be a good role model, (he’s over my place tonight in fact, with his dog Flash, and for the first time the dog’s out back. Can’t see him but he’s down the back somewhere I hope. The boy will be devo’d if he gets away)

Anyway, struggling as always to decide to have a bourbon or not. They tell me I can’t coz the sugar in the bourbon will add the weight on, but screw it. I’ll justify it coz I only drink it with soda not coke, haha. Oh…… there’s the dog, actually had a few too many bourbons and haven’t got my glasses on, looks like two of em. Get out of here dog I’m trying to bare my soul to facebook. Haha. I tell ya, facebook though lately is becoming far less fun, since the #toastergate incident.

Getting more famous though, haha. I did hear today from Dan and Soa about maybe, just maybe, there’s a tiny chance of hiring the Rock at an event in the next year, and if that’s the case, I jokingly said to Dan I’ll need a bodyguard, and so will he if we make this one happen. I tell ya, if we make this one I’ll be his bloody bodyguard (I used to wrestle you know) and he’ll be my best mate for LIFE!!!!!

(He’s changed his name a few times from Dan Deltondo, to Dan Delts, dunno what I should call him!! We might have to make up new names for each other, haha. He does have smoking Delts though, so it fits)

Last few days have been nuts. I thought only women could do this multitasking thing. Well maybe they can, coz I seem to flit from task to task, client to client, and I end up taking all day to do what probably could’ve taken me an hour if I’d focused. (so I end up having to do these INSANE long hours, 5am club is a sleep in, silly long nights).

Hate to get all D and M, but it’s possibly why my last (and the one before and the one before that) didn’t work out. And now I’m 45, thoughts of mortality enter my head way WAY too often. Friends parents passing, thank goodness mine are still rocking) but when my mate Soa lost his Mum, I saw how much of a role model she was for him, and it made me think what will happen when my parents (where’s some would to touch) aren’t with us. I mean, it’s bad enough when our heroes are all getting outted for some sort of sexual craziness with who knows who. If Bill Cosby is the most prolific rapist in the history of the world, are any of our heroes safe from scandal. Arnold is probably the one who owned his shit totally. (Sir the way you composed yourself in Sydney regarding that matter was simply inspiring).

I mean clearly this stuff has been happening all along our lives, we just didn’t see it. Weinstein, Spacey, Cosby, I mean they even going after Stallone, with all sorts of unproven allegations.

So think I gonna go for a holiday with my girl. She is my saviour. So far I’ve really only been to the USA about 10 plus times, maybe more, but really nowhere else. Think it’s time to visit somewhere else. Scares me a little to go to a place where they don’t speak English.

I’ve seen the vids online, but mainly my experience of the rest of the world is limited to what I see in movies like ‘The Golden Child’ with Eddie Murphy, him getting ripped off in the marketplace. OR Indiana Jones and stuff. I mean cows roaming the streets, so we’ll see where I end up going. I guess even though the USA has homeless people and stuff, they’re for some reason, safer in my head than other countries where in my silly head, they have less to lose. Never know, I might find religion !! (doubt it though, but I’ll at least appreciate the architecture coz all those places have way more history than here in Australia, or the USA.)

In meantime, gonna get back to Dan see if we can do the impossible again, but I tell ya, he can change his name to anything he wants if he helps me pull this off. Shit, he can call me a chicks name for all I give a shit. I’ll be his beyotch. haha. Least I can do is call him Dan Delts !!

Anyway, all these random thoughts I shouldn’t have spilled my guts with this weird short dude I’ve never met. He listened intently to my ramblings and I said see ya. He was a cool bloke to listen so well. He said I was an interesting dude, (cmpliments are the easiest way to get to me!! Haha) and he might write a song about me, haha. Yeah as if that’ll happen. Think he said his name was Paul something or other.


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